Call me Mr.Luck
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Close Call
A "close call" is defined as:
A very difficult decision, or something bad that almost happens. Now, I know everyone experiences a close call or two in their lifetime, but after yesterday I need to write this shit out.
On tuesday I received a call from one of my friends while I was extraordinarily high doing some homework. It was one of those quick call that sounds something like this:
"gay guy what up?"
"want some free gas?"
"dude"
"get over here."
CLICK.
Apparently my friend was fixing something on his gas tank and it was too heavy to lift, so he had to empty the gas. When I got to his house he had his truck lifted up on two dinky jacks in his driveway with 2 Home Depot buckets and a tiny gas can filled to the brim with gasoline. He grabbed a funnel and proceeded to pour it in my truck."Well ain't this just my lucky day," I said with a smile. After we finished up I offered to help him lift the gas tank up while he reattached it to the bottom of the truck. Oh I forgot to mention. I don't know jackshit about working on cars or their parts... sooooo most likely I won't be using the right terminology and just describing it. Anyways, we got underneath the truck and I tried my best to hold the giant, looked more like a small boat, gas can up as my friend tried to bolt it back into place. I could tell he was having trouble screwing the bolt back into place because of two things:
a.) He was cussing.
b.) His face was beat red as tiny beads of sweat formed in every crevice.
Suddenly, as he was trying to push the bolt back into place the truck shift, violently falling ontop of us in shock. When the truck moved, the dinky jacks moved, letting the truck fall back to the ground. Luckily it wasn't a car, but I still manage to fling myself from the truck like a scared cat when sprayed with water. "Jesus Christ," I yelled in disbelief. I had never seen this happen before. Before I could completely collect myself I heard this groaning sound coming from the other side of the truck. "Ohhh fuck! I'm stuck!" My friend yelled as I ran to the other side of the truck. I could see the back right tire landed on both his feet when the truck fell. He looked at me in agony, "I can't get my feet out! Get the jack! Hurry! Lift it up!
Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I reacted calm or swift, or like I'd done this before. I freaked out! My legs felts like weights when I sprinted to find the jack, which seemed like a mile away. I picked it up and swore there was no way it could possible weigh this much. Seconds seemed like minutes when you're hearing a full-grown man moan in pain. The first time I tried to use the jack I couldn't figure out how to lower it so I could put it under the axel. I was grabbing things, trying to twist or pull anything that would move. "Hey Nick grab the handle of the jack," my friend said as he layed on the ground, eyes closed, and the most painful expression I've ever seen.
DING DONG! The light bulb came on, my senses cleared up, and I realized what to do. I grabbed the handle of the jack and stuck it in the necessary spot and turned it, lowering the jack. I moved it into a position next to his foot and started jacking the car up as quickly as possible. It seemed like it took thirty minutes to lift his truck up 2 inches but I finally saw him scatter away from the tire. He managed to stand up pretty quickly, which I knew was great news, and he seemed not to be in much pain afterwards. I just layed on the oil stained driveway, my entire body sore feeling like I had just done a Iron Man marathon.
You wanna talk about losing your high quickly? This is definitely one way I don't recommend.
A very difficult decision, or something bad that almost happens. Now, I know everyone experiences a close call or two in their lifetime, but after yesterday I need to write this shit out.
On tuesday I received a call from one of my friends while I was extraordinarily high doing some homework. It was one of those quick call that sounds something like this:
"gay guy what up?"
"want some free gas?"
"dude"
"get over here."
CLICK.
Apparently my friend was fixing something on his gas tank and it was too heavy to lift, so he had to empty the gas. When I got to his house he had his truck lifted up on two dinky jacks in his driveway with 2 Home Depot buckets and a tiny gas can filled to the brim with gasoline. He grabbed a funnel and proceeded to pour it in my truck."Well ain't this just my lucky day," I said with a smile. After we finished up I offered to help him lift the gas tank up while he reattached it to the bottom of the truck. Oh I forgot to mention. I don't know jackshit about working on cars or their parts... sooooo most likely I won't be using the right terminology and just describing it. Anyways, we got underneath the truck and I tried my best to hold the giant, looked more like a small boat, gas can up as my friend tried to bolt it back into place. I could tell he was having trouble screwing the bolt back into place because of two things:
a.) He was cussing.
b.) His face was beat red as tiny beads of sweat formed in every crevice.
Suddenly, as he was trying to push the bolt back into place the truck shift, violently falling ontop of us in shock. When the truck moved, the dinky jacks moved, letting the truck fall back to the ground. Luckily it wasn't a car, but I still manage to fling myself from the truck like a scared cat when sprayed with water. "Jesus Christ," I yelled in disbelief. I had never seen this happen before. Before I could completely collect myself I heard this groaning sound coming from the other side of the truck. "Ohhh fuck! I'm stuck!" My friend yelled as I ran to the other side of the truck. I could see the back right tire landed on both his feet when the truck fell. He looked at me in agony, "I can't get my feet out! Get the jack! Hurry! Lift it up!
Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I reacted calm or swift, or like I'd done this before. I freaked out! My legs felts like weights when I sprinted to find the jack, which seemed like a mile away. I picked it up and swore there was no way it could possible weigh this much. Seconds seemed like minutes when you're hearing a full-grown man moan in pain. The first time I tried to use the jack I couldn't figure out how to lower it so I could put it under the axel. I was grabbing things, trying to twist or pull anything that would move. "Hey Nick grab the handle of the jack," my friend said as he layed on the ground, eyes closed, and the most painful expression I've ever seen.
DING DONG! The light bulb came on, my senses cleared up, and I realized what to do. I grabbed the handle of the jack and stuck it in the necessary spot and turned it, lowering the jack. I moved it into a position next to his foot and started jacking the car up as quickly as possible. It seemed like it took thirty minutes to lift his truck up 2 inches but I finally saw him scatter away from the tire. He managed to stand up pretty quickly, which I knew was great news, and he seemed not to be in much pain afterwards. I just layed on the oil stained driveway, my entire body sore feeling like I had just done a Iron Man marathon.
You wanna talk about losing your high quickly? This is definitely one way I don't recommend.
This is neither me, my friend, or his vechile. Just some redneck in the same positon as my friend yesterday. |
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Bikram Yoga? What is it?
Most likely if you're a woman or have a girlfriend, you've either been or heard of this type of exercise. For the rest of you, Bikram Yoga is basically yoga but in a burning hot room. Actually, this exercise is becoming quite the popular trend for women looking for something new or homosexual men looking to sweat. Just kidding about the gay part but people seem to love this stuff! No clue why anyone would want to supress themselves to this torture chamber but they do it.
The other day I was talking with my girlfriend about possibly joining her in the activity sometime. She locked eyes with mine and very subtly said, "You wouldn't last 10 minutes before you quit or puked."
"Oh really now?," I replied sarcastically, "but ever positive she was right. If anyone is out of shape, that man would be me. Now when I say "out of shape" I don't mean like the fat guy shopping at Albertsons on one of those scooters. I mean I don't ever exercise and i'm not in the shape I USED to be in. Actually, not even sure if I was ever in shape, but I used to be able to run a mile without collapsing at the finish.
The other day I was talking with my girlfriend about possibly joining her in the activity sometime. She locked eyes with mine and very subtly said, "You wouldn't last 10 minutes before you quit or puked."
"Oh really now?," I replied sarcastically, "but ever positive she was right. If anyone is out of shape, that man would be me. Now when I say "out of shape" I don't mean like the fat guy shopping at Albertsons on one of those scooters. I mean I don't ever exercise and i'm not in the shape I USED to be in. Actually, not even sure if I was ever in shape, but I used to be able to run a mile without collapsing at the finish.
Friday, June 10, 2011
All is fair in love and baseball
CHECK THIS OUT. THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T GO TO BASEBALL GAMES WITH YOUR MOM.
If you're looking for something to read or watch when bored look no further. This will be your go-to site for now on. Take a second and check it out. Thingstodowhenyourbored.
My future website
I'm trying to start a cap gun site to help bring in a little extra income. I figure it would be a great way to be more productive and try something new. Everyone says you need a niche, and maybe one day this will be mine. The site is still in the baby stages as I haven't put any content on it. This is proably what the first page will read:
CAPGUNS.ORG
All the hottest cap guns on the web in one spot
Finding your favorite cap gun has never been easier. We offer a wide variety of guns ranging from small hand-guns to bazookas with detailed descriptions and pictures for every cap gun in our inventory.
We’re constantly updating our catalog of guns and accessories for every kid or kid inside of us. Don’t see anything you like? No problem! Just contact us and tell us what kind or style of cap gun you’re interested in and we’ll find it. Simple as that.
HISTORY
A cap gun is classified as a toy gun that looks and sounds precisely like a real one. They get their name from the small discs of explosive compounds that provides the noise and smoke. Cap guns have been around before World War II when they were created with cast iron, then zinc alloy and recently made into plastic.
The “Golden Age” for cap guns came after World War II when television and cinema screened many westerns and cowboy films featuring stars like Roy Rogers, Gene Autry, and The Lone Ranger. Children all over the world imitated these heroes and collected and played with toy cap guns. These pistols came in 3 different style from the semi-automatic, revolver (revolving cylinder carrying a disk of caps) and the revolver that looks exactly the same but loads differently with a roll of caps instead. All early model guns carried only either rolled or disk caps
CHECK THE SITE OUT: http://www.capguns.org/
I love this commerical
Either I have nothing to talk about or I'm just really really bored. Maybe it's a mixture of both but I love this commerical!!!!
The commerical reminds me of my friends eventhough we never do this, and the fact my phone is from like 2002.
MORE post to come
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Why I don't know
Why do I care if you look at my blog? I have no clue, but I continuaously check to see if anyone has looked at it. And even if you did look at it how would I know? This blogger bitch only tells me the number of people visiting and what provider they use. It doesn't say Lee Broc looked at your blog today and thought it sucked. It won't tell me one clue on how or where these people see it or what they think of it. But yet I check this bastard daily looking. Why?
Another question. So i'm in the Panda Express drive-thru line and i'm behind one car. Its a green pick-up truck with tinted windows so I can't see the drivers but I can see the order went wrong and they're giving the food back. Anyways, I sat there in my truck waiting for 15 minutes while they got their order right. 15 MINUTES man! Thats a long time. I know it doesn't seem long, but YOU sit in your car for 15 mintues and do nothing. It takes forever. Anyways, the question is... why didn't I just reverse and go inside? Why didn't I just realize i'm a fat ass and didn't need to be eating that crap. Why I don't know but I sat there until the green truck left and I received my orange and mandarin chicken.
Another question. So i'm in the Panda Express drive-thru line and i'm behind one car. Its a green pick-up truck with tinted windows so I can't see the drivers but I can see the order went wrong and they're giving the food back. Anyways, I sat there in my truck waiting for 15 minutes while they got their order right. 15 MINUTES man! Thats a long time. I know it doesn't seem long, but YOU sit in your car for 15 mintues and do nothing. It takes forever. Anyways, the question is... why didn't I just reverse and go inside? Why didn't I just realize i'm a fat ass and didn't need to be eating that crap. Why I don't know but I sat there until the green truck left and I received my orange and mandarin chicken.
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